The year.

I've been way too busy to be updating this blog. That's fine with me- the other things in my life are obviously more important. My kids, my family, my business. And on top of that, how many boring family blogs need to exist in the world? My kids did this, I cooked something boring for dinner, look at us blah blah blah. It's so antiquated. If you know us, and you're important to us, then you know what's happening in our lives. I've been using mainly facebook to update family. It's more instantaneous, it's easily changed, it's a much easier and less static way of bragging, I suppose.

Anyway, this year has brought so much into our lives. Namely, Joseph's birth. His first year has flown by, and he'll be a year old in two weeks. He's by far the most content, happiest, sweetest kid I've ever met. Let's keep our fingers crossed that those traits will continue and not be muddied by his toddler years.

Christmas is always a launching pad into the birthday month for us- Mine is January 2nd, Ella's is the 3rd, my Dad is the 4th, my sister Sarah's is the 11th, and now Joseph's is the 15th. So it's rare that we actually take a breath and revel in Christmas. But I'm vowing to do so from now on. As a kid, I hated feeling the looming birthday on Christmas morning, and even more, I hated the dreaded combined 'Birthday/Christmas present.'  So here's a little bit of Christmas. And ONLY Christmas.

I can not tell you how blessed I am to have Ivan.

He's such a patient, fun, incredible father to these kids of ours. I couldn't ask for more.

The Birthday Boy.

I'll write something to him personally about how he's changed our lives, our family, and me.

These kids are so magnificent, in so many ways. Joseph was born and is now learning to walk and talk, Ella learned to swim, started reading and stared First Grade, Noah jumped into toddler-hood with both feet, and can't stop doing karate and singing and dancing.

We'll see if this blog continues for me. I'm not sure if I'll have time, with all the big things going on for us. I'm not going to say for certain that it's staying or going.

Thanks for the memories, 2010. You were the first year we spent as the Fam Five.  

Well hello, 2010.

Apparently, it's Fall.

So, it's been a while since I posted anything here. I've been pretty exhausted with this pregnancy, and chasing Noah and getting Ella to and from school have all proven to be more than a full time job. We did, however, make some time a couple weeks ago to go to the pumpkin patch. Ella loved every second, Noah wanted to just run and be free (As usual). It's getting to the point where I can't let Noah out of the stroller in public, as he knows I can't catch him and thinks it's hilarious to run and taunt me. Anyway, we had a great Halloween, with waaay too much walking, too much candy, and not enough sleep. But the kids had a blast, and I've learned that's really all these holidays are about: parents getting exhausted while kids run a muk. Ah, memories.

Anyway, I feel as though I blinked and it's November. We're waist-deep in autumn, no matter what the thermometer says, and we're running full force at Baby Day. I honestly don't know how I'm going to make it to January, as I'm as big, as tired, and as waddley (I just made that word up) as I was when I gave birth to Noah. I feel unprepared, in a physical, literal, and emotional sense. So, we'll see.

In the meantime, I'm trying to just enjoy each day, to look at the leaves of autumn rather than worry about the cold of winter.

Good news, Bad news.

The Good news: Ella started Kindergarten, and all is well. She loves her class, loves school, loves having lunch at school, and I love having one kid outta the house for four hours a day.

The Bad News: She didn't let me take one picture of her on her first day. Not. One. "Mommmm, not now." "No, Mommy. don't take pictures." And because the last thing I want is to push a first-time kindergartener into a meltdown on her first day, I didn't. And I just KNOW I'm gonna be sorry.

Marching forward

Whether I approve or not, my kids are growing up. Ella starts kindergarten tomorrow. And we'll have to say goodbye to that "baby" part of her. Even as she was in preschool last year, it was as if every new thing she learned, as her vocabulary expanded, as her view of the world widened, her little innocent face changed. She went from a naive baby girl to a grown, independent, young girl. And while I know I should be proud that she can spell small words, and add numbers, and understands the world in a more complex way, I just can't help but be sad to say goodbye to the baby phase of her life. After all, she's my first. My first baby. Having her changed my life, changed who I am. And to see her move on to a new phase just rips my heart out. I often want to stop time, to just stay right here, rolling around in bed on a Saturday morning watching silly cartoons with Ella laying next to me, Noah climbing all over us, and Ivan still half asleep. I feel this urgent push toward a day when my kids don't want me to kiss them in public, when they don't pick up their cell phone when I call. And I just can't handle that. Okay, maybe it's the pregnancy hormones raging through me, but it's true. How do we do this? How do we sit back and let these moments end, without a fight? How do we let the inevitable happen?

I'm not sure yet.
But I'll keep you posted.

Shameless Self Promotion

Well I've launched my new photography website, so go visit it and think of me when you have any photography needs!

Intuitive Images

We're still here.

I'm terrible at updating, apparently.

Turns out, with a five year old at home for summer vacation, a one year old who sleeps in our bed and can't stop nursing, and being five months pregnant, I don't get time to sit at the computer like I want to. I don't even get the dishes done. Who'da thunk?

Well, we're in full pregnancy swing over here. Mood swings, cravings, no sleep, bathroom breaks, everything. And we're also expecting... another boy. Wait, that didn't sound excited. ... ANOTHER BOOOOY!!!!! WOOHOO!!!!

Just typing that sentence made me tired.

I must say, as this pregnancy was a complete surprise, I've had to make an effort to really get on board with having another kid. And now, another boy? Noah has now reached the age where the differences between boys and girls are glaringly apparent. Mainly, he likes to hit things, climb things, and the word "no" means absolutely nothing to him. Toys are uninteresting- remote controls and Dad's shoes, and tools, and punching walls are all much better options than that little plastic thing with the flashing lights. Yesterday, Noah got two baths. One for a dog poop crisis, one for a paint can disaster. I won't go into details, but it was insane. And the whole time, I just kept thinking, "There are going to be TWO of these. And they're going to conspire together." I suddenly feel outnumbered and a bit helpless.

And, after that crazy day, and my exhaustion, and the multiple baths, and the cleaning a pint of brown paint off the floor and moldings, I put him to sleep. And he was quiet. And beautiful. And amazing.

And I suddenly didn't mind that he would have a little brother, a best friend. Someone to stay up and tell scary stories to, to share things with, to protect and love.

I think we'll be okay.

But I may not sleep for another couple years..... so don't make fun of my hair.